Some couple report to using pornography as a way to enhance their sexual relationship. Others don’t want anything to do with it. And a third group have opposing views about the use of pornography.
What happens when one partner wants to view pornography independently of the relationship? What does this solo sexual gratification mean to the relationship? Should it be seen as a threat to a partner? Or is should a partner just accept that viewing porn is the norm? What happens if a partner becomes hooked on pornography?
We see lots of couples experiencing problems because either one has become dependent on internet sex or have porn addiction. Far too many couples don’t know how to deal with pornography in their relationship.
Do you find you are being secretive about your online activity? Or perhaps you are spending increasing amounts of time online alone? Maybe you have compulsive thoughts about using the internet for sexual purposes and are finding it difficlut to break? Any of these can begin to cause problems in your ‘real-life’ relatiionships.
Perhaps you are feeling more aroused by online activity than you do with your partner or you feel guilt about the amount of time you spend on the internet and get angry if challenged. Perhaps you argue that “internet sex isn’t real” so your partner shouldn’t get upset. If you recognise any of these signs in yourself, or in your partner, then the internet or porn may be affecting your relationship.
This topic can cause great stress in relationships. Because, even though technology is offering access that is affordable and provides anonymity, it doesn’t reduce the negative impact it can have on a partner. People often report that discovering their partner is regulary using pornography feel as much a betrayal as a real life affair.
Our couple counsellors will you both talk through how you are feeling. We will help the person, who has come dependent on porn, to understand what they are getting from it and the impact it is having on their partner and their relationship. This understanding goes a long way in helping you both find a way to move forward.
If you would like some help to deal with the impact of porn in your relationship contact us at Relationsip Counselling Surrey today Request an appointment
We are an experienced team of professional relationship counsellors located throughout Surrey. Relationship Counselling Surrey will help you gain understanding of your partner’s perspective. This will enable you both to move forward in the direction you choose.
Dear Relationship Counselling Surrey I can't thank you enough for all your help during our sessions. You have given me the tools and skills I need to move forward in a positive way. I particularly liked the way you had saved notes from my first contact for counselling so that at the end we could re-cap and ensure all my issues had been worked through. What was really interesting is the way you helped me to work through my problems rather than just suggesting solutions to me. I enjoyed my "eureka" moments where suddenly a penny would drop and I would see something from a completely different perspective. Thanking you so much,
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After only 2 appointments with things started to get better and then continued to grow each session after that. With our new communication skills and understanding of each other I feel like we are back in love again! I would tell anyone not to be scared or embarrassed and it is worth every penny"
"When my wife suggested that we should see a relationship counsellor but I thought it was a stupid idea and was very sceptical and cynical!. However, Allie made us both feel very relaxed from the outset and she never took sides in any of our conversations. Unfortunately we were not able to save our relationship but Allie helped us through the difficult process and made the separation so such much easier. I would recommend her to anyone who is having problems"
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